ANGER

Another shooting. Is uncontrollable rage always a mental illness issue?

When I was going thru my training I retook again and again Conflict Resolution and Assertiveness/Aggressiveness classes. They were certainly some of my biggest problems. I had defined myself as an "easy-going" person. But the more I grasped the content of these alien courses, I realized I never saw myself being assertive or expressing anger- so I assumed that meant I was good-natured. Not true- all my anger was suppressed which led in my case to depression.
Not many are as lucky as myself to get this training, where I had to learn to recognize my body's signals that I had a conflict that needed attention. I retook those classes so many times, I eventually started co-teaching them. That's how I started. So I passed on my training to as many attendees as possible. As one of the men said, who was attending my class because he was sent by the courts, "Why didn't someone ever teach me about this?"

Although the logical signal that you have a conflict- that someone is doing something that annoys you - is the feeling of slight irritation to extreme anger - I personally felt guilt, (I shouldn't get angry- that's not nice) or fear (I was fearful of someone not approving of me or the potential negative reaction of the other person).  Some of the men in the class got no emotional signals at all- if you have been trained to be unemotional- the manly man- you lose the ability to recognize any signal. Sometimes their signals were physical- stomach problems- or behavioral- drinking- drugging. More about this with my next post...............